31 March 2009

I love good lyrics.

Guys, I'd rather do anything than my lab report about a particle in a box...

So, I'm going to post some of my favorite lyrics.

Yelle - Tu Es Beau
"Tu es beau mais qu'est ce que t'es laid." - (Fr.: You are beautiful, but that is what you're ugly for.)

Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Runaway
"Can't help looking back. Highways flew by. Run, run, run away. No sense of time. Want you to stay. Want to keep you inside."

Lykke Li - Tonight
"Dry my eyes so you won't know. Dry my eyes so I won't show. I know you're right behind me. And don't you let me go, let me go tonight. Don't you let me go."

The Get Up Kids - Long Goodnight
"It comes with no reply. Hold on too tight. I hang on every word. If it all ended tonight, you know that I wouldn’t mind. Back to the good old times."

Au Revoir Simone - All or Nothing

"Everywhere is somewhere, baby. So can't you see we're in the middle of somewhere? Nowhere just means knowing nothing of where you've been or where you're going."

The Parenthetical Girls - Love Connection

"Chapped lips, tongue kissed, insert expletive, fluids of a summer night. With slight duress, forced imperatives.......So take my lip between your teeth and taste me by devouring."

30 March 2009

Courtesy of Gavin

Gavin showed me this a few weeks ago. Apparently, he was chilling with Dan Le Sac at SXSW.

P.S. If you want FREE Street Carnage stickers, leave your name and address as a comment, and I'll get them to you type quick.

26 March 2009

Barney (Arvind) Turns 22!

Although I'm technically turning 22 tomorrow, H&M is a callous, heartless employer that has me working 'til midnight. Instead, I'm celebrating the following day (on which I am also working, but at least I'm getting out at 11). We'll be heading to Studio B, which is a throwback from two summers ago, but it was fun back then so I assume it'll be fun now. Plus, it's been renovated and there'll be two amazing DJs.

Saturday, March 28th to Sunday, March 29th.

Time: 10 PM to 4 AM.

Location: Studio B
259 Banker Street

Price: $10 advance, $15 at the door; I thoroughly suggest purchasing tickets in advance because Studio B tends to have disgusting lines, if not sold out shows.

Drinks: Two for one well drinks and domestic beers from 10 to 11; free well drink if you present your taxi receipt (must be dated that night); in all honesty, it's been awhile so I don't remember the exact prices, but I know it's a little higher than average; it's easy enough to sneak in a small bottle, though.

Music: You may know The Twelves as the two Brazilian guys who make the Black Kids' songs better. They broke onto the scene with an electro remix of "I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance" that pretty much ensured no one would ever listen to the original again. Yuksek, an electro DJ from Paris, similarly has a way with remixes, but his tend to be much more aggressive. Matt Cash is also spinning, but I have no idea who the fuck he is. Regardless, a few of the songs you can expect to hear are...

Black Kids - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance (The Twelves remix)
Radiohead - Reckoner (The Twelves remix)
Chromeo - Bonafide Lovin' (Yuksek remix)

Crowd: Mostly really drunk, really sweaty hipsters, which may sound absolutely horrible (the stench can be) but it just means they dance a lot and know how to have a good time; the dance floor tends to be jam-packed all night, but the bar and seating area aren't terribly claustrophobic; there's usually a line at the door at the start of the night, and the crowd only starts to wane after the headliners have finished up, which is usually about 2 AM.

ID: 19+; they don't scan, but they expect you to have government issued ID.

Coat Check: They have one, but I'm not sure how much it is; a lot of people tend to stash their stuff behind couches in the seating area, which is free of charge.

Directions: G train to Greenpoint Avenue; walk three blocks South on Manhattan Avenue to Calyer Street; turn right, and walk four blocks West on Calyer to Banker Street; turn left; Studio B is in the middle of the block.

A few photos from last time:

This Girl is Way 2 Funni

Check out this other blog for today.

New Artist Alert: The Band Cut Copy Jacked

[Disclaimer: This band is actually really fucking old; thus, it would probably have been more prudent to title this post "Really Old Artist Alert."]

I was driving home from Yacki's house tonight when the song "Six Months in a Leaky Boat" by Split Enz came on the radio. Listening to it, I couldn't help but notice its similarity to Cut Copy's "Feel the Love." I got home, did a little research, and all the pieces began to fall in place. Try to follow me here: Split Enz are from New Zealand, which is very close to Cut Copy's homeland (i.e. Australia). This means Cut Copy probably knew Split Enz's music when they began producing their own. Also, whereas Cut Copy have that whole '80s vibe, Split Enz are actually from the motherfucking '80s. Do you see where I'm going with this? Cut Copy jacked Split Enz! It was a devious plan, Cut Copy. I'm sure you thought no one would catch on because, well, who really gives a fuck about New Zealand? But now you've been ousted. In the end, I suppose it doesn't actually matter because Split Enz still comes out on top. Try as they might to "copy" (haha, get it?) Split Enz's sound, Cut Copy still haven't managed to produce a mildly racists music video that serves as a metaphoric excuse for homosexual experimentation in the prolonged absence of the opposite sex.

Split Enz - Six Months in a Leaky Boat (mp3)
Cut Copy - Feel the Love

25 March 2009

My rant...

Why is it that when one of your cavity fillings comes out and you don't have health insurance you either have the option of A) letting your tooth decay until the pain becomes so unbearable that you will (A1) lose your tooth or (A2) need a route canal (an $800-$1000 procedure), or option B) paying hundreds of dollars (~$200-$400) for a gratuitous amount of X-rays and a single tooth filling? Why is it that today in America we don't have universal health care, and the mere mention of it drives some people to heavily politicize the situation? HEY, I simply need health care! I don't care if you think associating universal health care with socialism will discourage me from bitching. If you think universal health care, "A.K.A." socialism, is bad, I'd rather just be considered Canadian. It's been months since I went to the doctor. My lungs are growing weaker every single time I get sick. I've been sick three times in the past 9 months, each time with bronchial infections, and in only one instance was I actually able to take antibiotics (which cost me $120 for a 10 day supply). I don't shit money, and my job won't offer me health insurance because I'm a motherfucking intern, a part-timer that doesn't get all of the benefits of a multi-billion dollar company. UGH! The frustration.

Oh, and don't get me started with the motherfucking MTA. They're vicious with their fare hikes. It seems it was only months ago that they raised the monthly unlimited from $76 to $81, but now $103? For fucking Christ's sake, so many people have been laid off, and as aforementioned, I have so many expenses as it is. Let's pray to God that the fare hike proposal is not passed tomorrow.

Should I just move to Canada? Would they welcome me?

23 March 2009


The L Magazine and Regent Releasing cordially invite you and a guest to a special advance screening of THE SONG OF SPARROWS, Tuesday, March 31st at 7p at a Manhattan theater. E-mail: Songofsparrows@thelmagazine.com with your full name.

22 March 2009

Neue Gallery

A few weeks ago, my friend and I went to the Neue Gallery, a neglected German/Austrian museum that is located just a few steps away from the Metropolitan Museum of Art. It was my first time seeing a work by Klimt in person:

Gustav Klimt, Adele Bloch-Bauer I, 1907,
oil, silver and gold on canvas.

It's about 3 feet tall and breathtaking. The brushstrokes are so thick that you can imagine the artist standing in front of the the canvas.

I discovered another artist by the name of
Egon Schiele. It's surprising how much work he produced within his short life span (334 oil paintings, 2,503 drawings). Take a look at one of his pieces that I found particularly good:

Egon Schiele, Self-Portrait with Arm Twisted Above Head
1910, watercolor and charcoal on paper.

A majority of his work is extremely lewd, and some of his portraits even make you wonder if he had incestuous relations with his younger sister, but it's his use of colors that evoke this sense of morbidity, which for some reason reminds me that I'm flawed.


I'm not a big fan of modern art, but this exhibit blew my mind. Both her innovative medium (LED screens) and writing are incredibly engaging. And her Iraq war inspired LEDs and portraits leave you questioning whether the material you've just been exposed to is factual. I highly recommend you visit her special exhibit at the Whitney Museum, which ends May 31st.

Jenny Holzer, Green Purple Cross, 2008, and Blue Cross, 2008.

Win of the Week

Rocks. Every kid had a different fascination. Mine was rocks. I remember the thrill of purchasing rocks and adding them to my collection. I slowly lost interest in the collection and lost a majority of my rocks. My fascination was reinvigorated after walking through a collection at the New York State Museum in Albany, NY, which is where Arvind pointed out this beauty:

(Coming Tonight)

If you're interested about how rocks fluoresce, click:


Akron/Family's "Ed Is A Portal" mixes a variety of genres that keeps you wondering what's next. Enjoy.

Akron/Family - Ed Is A Portal (mp3)

20 March 2009

The Parenthetical Girls

Disclaimer: If you're Aileen Olmedo, then do not continue reading.

I don't mean to ruin the ending of Anna Karenina, but I remember sitting in my Tolstoy versus Dostoevsky class and practically 90% of the class already knowing it. I felt stupid, so I sat there quietly and pretended to know it.

Basically, I came across this song on hypem.com, and not only was the vocalist's voice interesting, but the lyrics were fucking amazing:

And when they pulled you from the tracks / Your body splayed and split / Your chest flushed bright as it was in life / When they pulled you from the tracks, mindful of your separate halves / Your face relaxed lying flat upon your back / Body brushed beneath such crushing weight / Stolen in your awkward stage that you never would escape / The same state that decorates your chest and face with a scarlet mark of shame when you'd stutter out of place / And when they pulled you from the tracks your eyes gone milky white, strangely alive.

These lines remind me so much of when I started Part Seven of Anna Karenina. I remember reading these lines and crying so hard:

A little muzhik, muttering to himself, was working over some iron. And the candle by the light of which she had been reading that book filled with anxieties, deceptions, grief and evil, flared up brighter than ever, lit up her all that had once been in darkness, sputtered, grew dim, and went out forever.

The Parenthetical Girls - The Weight She Fell Under (mp3)

I hope you enjoy this song as much as I do.

15 March 2009

Sex and the Cyber City: Addictions Become More Apparent After Witnessing PDA

So I honestly thought the series would end when I refused to pay, hence my last post. But as I was canceling my subscription to "Matches.com," curiosity got the better of me. I looked through the guys who winked at me, and I found an exception: an extremely handsome looking man living in Brooklyn. Where was he two months ago?! As I was going to resubscribe with my mom's credit info (I swear I'll pay her back) the light bulb went off in my little head. (Well, I actually have a lollipop head, but that's besides the point.) I decided to give "E-expenso" a try. I mean if I'm going to be bad, might as well indulge. It's like if you're going to break the law and do drugs, skip the weak shit like marijuana and go straight for the yayo.

I joined "E-expenso" last night and spent a good two hours looking through an assortment of white boys with green eyes. "E-expenso" was right on the money with my aesthetic wants, although there were a few chubs and picture-less profiles*. I could deal though.

Clicking through the list with 72 potentials, I sorted them into three piles. Out of the 72, 17 went into my "interested" pile, 15 went into my "maybe", and the rest were rejected with my reply being "I'm currently taking a break from dating". Obviously, that's a lie. Sorry. I'm not vain, but for the amount of money that my mom is "lending" me, I have to be selective and on point.

After selecting the chosen few I then proceeded to go through what "E-expenso" calls guided communication, which consists of sending each other five questions and then answering them, sending each other our likes and dislikes in a partner, sending each other three final questions, reading a message from Dr. Warren (no idea who he is), and finally having open communication with each other.

So far, I've submitted five questions for the chosen:

1. If you were taken by your date to a party where you knew no one, how would you respond?
a. stay close to my date, letting her introduce me
b. find a spot at the back bar and relax alone, letting her work the room
c. strike out on my room, introducing myself and even making friends
d. I would ask my partner if I could skip out on this particular event

2. Where do you see yourself living in 15 years?
a. a nice apartment in the city
b. a nice house in the suburbs
c. a house in a small town
d. a house in the country

3.Your idea of adventure is:
a. whitewater rafting
b. karaoke singing
c. trying a different route to work
d. ordering a dish you've never tried before

4. Would you rather date someone who is:
a. very busy, with a sometimes chaotic schedule, who books times with you in advance
b. busy, with a structured schedule, you know what days the person will be available for fun
c. slightly busy, who works during the day and is available most nights
d. not busy and has lots of free time

5. Do you consider yourself an ambitious person?
a. by definition I am very ambitious
b. I have clear goals and sometimes consider myself ambitious
c. I am pursuing some life goals, but do not consider myself to be very ambitious
d. I consider myself quite content as is

And now I wait patiently for their answers.

- Aileen Awesome

*Please note: If you do not have your picture up on a dating website, or any peer to peer website for that matter, you're chances are extremely slim of getting picked for a cyber date. The selector will be brutal and never choose you. We assume that there is something to hide and, based on my experiences, when you hide yourself from the public it can only mean three things: a) you're fat, b) you're ugly, or c) you're both fat and ugly. So please, if you got nothing to hide be proud to show what you're momma gave ya. Once again, I'm not vain. I'm just realistic baby.

P.S. The only date that I've managed to secure from "Matches.com" is taking me out on a date. And no, I won't put out, but I will give you an honest update.

12 March 2009

Clipping: YLHCSD is not Crystal Castles

Sometimes it takes a single artist to pique the attention of music fans around the world before a flood of similar acts get noticed. Justice’s remix of a Simian Mobile Disco song, "We Are Your Friends," had to become an Internet hit and dance floor staple before most fans learned of other electro artists like Boys Noize, Calvin Harris or even Simian Mobile Disco themselves. In a similar way, Crystal Castles’ dynamic rise has opened the door for many other similar artists, such as Great Britain’s You Love Her Coz She’s Dead.

YLHCSD are similar to Crystal Castles in more ways than one. Both bands produce dance music influenced by chiptune, a genre of electronic music that samples sounds from classic video game consoles and makes use of 8-bit melodies. Both bands are composed of a hyperactive female vocalist/frontwoman and a multi-instrumental, leather-jacket-donning male. Both make use of vocoders, bass guitars and drums. Both put on extremely energetic, borderline chaotic live shows. Both also have a penchant for remixes, taking on a wide variety of artists that include Britney Spears, Foals and Uffie.

But that’s not to say that they are exactly the same. As opposed to Crystal Castles’ dark, "thrash" style, YLHCSD are more upbeat and influenced by late ’90s trance music. The four songs off YLHCSD’s recent EP, Inner City Angst, have soaring synthesizer harmonies and feature a few stereotypical sound effects. There are also traces of punk caught in the rapid bass guitar riffs and desperate male vocals, a feature that separates YLHCSD from Crystal Castles.

Chances are that most listeners will have first heard Crystal Castles due to their prominence and popularity, and thus assume that YLHCSD are simply following a successful, established formula. But both bands formed around the same time, producing similar music completely independent of one another. Nevertheless, YLHCSD have definitely heard the comparisons. If their new EP is any indication, they don’t plan on standing in Crystal Castles’ shadow for much longer.

- printed in the March 9th edition of The Ticker

You Love Her Coz She's Dead - Inner City Angst (EP minimix)
You Love Her Coz She's Dead - Superheroes
AutoKratz - Stay the Same (You Love Her Coz She's Dead remix)
Britney Spears - Womanizer (You Love Her Coz She's Dead remix)

08 March 2009


The L Magazines and Fox Searchlight Pictures are giving you a chance to win a screening pass for two to see "MISS MARCH", Thursday, March 12th at 7 PM at a Manhattan theater. To enter, send an e-mail with your full name, date of birth, and phone number to MISSMARCH@THELMAGAZINE.COM.

The L Magazine and Regent Releasing cordially invite you and a guest to a special advance screening of "TOKYO SONATA", Tuesday, March 10th at 7 PM at a Manhattan theater. To enter, e-mail: TOKYO@THELMAGAZINE.COM with your full name.

(I'd suggest you give a fake number or your home phone number because it's questionable why they would need your number in the first place.)


MY GIRLFRIEND IS BETTER THAN YOURS - My Girlfriend is Better Than Yours


WE HAVE BAND - Hear It In The Cans

06 March 2009

Friday Morning Blues


It's been too long.

The Legislative Office Building (the place where I work) is a 7 story building constructed in a modernist, imposing, Imperial style. Today, Friday, it is an empty shell. On Tuesdays there are so many lobbyists in the building that you have to wait up to ten minutes to catch an elevator. On Wednesdays you can always grab a free breakfast. On Thursdays all the Senators need to collect their shit to get back to their districts for the weekend. These days are active, interesting and full of purpose. Fridays are the shit you take after a week-long bender. Fuck, I'm just hung-over, don't listen to me, Fridays are alright.

So! Maybe you want to know about the internal workings of the State government. Those soft cogs we call representatives are just normal people. They curse, smoke, drink, and believe things for absolutely no reason. Senator Diane Savino and I are not on good terms. We're not on bad terms, there just hasn't been a great deal of interaction between the two of us. I've been trying to catch her while she smokes a cigarette outside, but it never quite works out.

It's getting later in the morning and the phones are starting to ring, the mail is piling up and my co-workers are beginning to demand things of me. We will have to talk later.

03 March 2009

Sex and the Cyber City: I Shall Overcome

My one month membership has now expired. I get daily e-mails from matches.com promising me that the next time I sign up I will not only get a discounted membership, but will also have a slew of guys to choose from.

Did someone call bullshit? 'Cause I did.

These e-mails are jam packed with photos of potential suitors. Some of them look agreeable, but not agreeable enough for me to pay $34.99. We're in a recession for chrissake, and I need to save my money for what's really important--the Rachel Zoe's 4 inch platform recommended shoes on piperline.com!

Back to the topic: It just gets really annoying getting these constant e-mails on my Blackberry. It's even more annoying when the pictures they send are of fuglies.

After my experience, I probably wouldn't join the site again. Out of the many guys I've seen and connected with (around 8 guys) on matches.com, it would definitely not be worth it for me to join again. I could just as easily find some guy at Happy Ending. Wait, bad example. Those are not the type of guys I could take home to a practicing Buddhist mother. I need guys with a little more class.

Well my point is the website was lame. I expected a bunch of hot career men with their lives together. Instead I got a whole lot of "old men with kids" types. The few I did manage to click with (get it- click with because it's cyber dating) seem like a distant memory now. Empty promises to meet over dinner, probably more flaking on my part than theirs.

Although there is a fellow who has managed to stay connected. We even connected via Facebook, which is a big deal. We still have plans to meet and after much lurking on Facebook, the plans are pretty solid. We regularly text each other, but like so many of those fish I've cyber-met, he too lives a good two hours away. And because he lives two hours away, our first date would be one of those where you feel obligated to sleep with him. I guess I shouldn't meet him.

Internet dating is best left to those who really don't have people skills and the time, or are just plain fulgy. There are those rare instances where you get a bingo, but those are far and wide apart, and, for $34.99, a bit pricey. I lack neither skills nor time, which is why I will conclude this experiment as failed. Maybe I'll try again when and if (big "if" there, hopefully) I'm 35 and single.

I may consider e-expenso.com, just to be on the safe side.

-Aileen Awesome

Joshua's Finally 21

FUN FACT: Joshua's dad is famous saxophonist and high school teacher, Steve Harvey!

So our boy Joshua is finally turning 21--who knew someone had a birthday later than both Darlene and Anna?--and we've decided to celebrate at Royal Oak, a great bar we recently discovered in Williamsburg. There's no cover, cheap booze, decent DJs and riotous dancing. Thus, there's no reason not for you to come. Unless you're racist. And you aren't racist, are you?

FUN FACT: Joshua and I went to elementary school together, but only one of us graduated!

Friday, March 6th to Saturday, March 7th.

Time: 11 PM to 4 AM.

Location: Royal Oak
594 Union Avenue

Price: Free.

Drinks: Strong cocktails for only $5; decent selection of beer $4 a pint; I think they only serve beer by the glass so you can't sneak any in, but last time we did manage to sneak in a bottle of Captain Morgan.

Music: No name DJs spinning typical sets of equal parts pop, electro and hip hop. A few of songs played last time were...

Justice - We Are Your Friends

Daft Punk - One More Time
Cut Copy - Hearts on Fire

Crowd: Strange mix of white hipsters and ghetto kids, kind of like the crowd from Lazy Catfish; at first they seem to take turns dancing: hipsters awkwardly moving to Cut Copy and then the ghetto kids enjoying an old school rap track, but by the end of the night everyone is thoroughly trashed, integrated, and jumping up and down; the crowd starts off sparse, but steadily collects throughout the night so that by 1 or 2 AM the place is packed.

ID: 21+, but they don't check; I don't believe a single person in our group was asked for ID last time.

Coat Check: Don't have one; stash your stuff at one of the tables if you manage to get there early enough to snag one.

Directions: L train to Bedford; walk three blocks East on North 7th to Havemayer Street; turn left, and walk three blocks North on Havemayer to Union Ave; turn left on Union Ave, and walk two blocks North on Union to Richardson Street; Royal Oak is on the corner.

Alternatively, G train to Manhattan Avenue; walk one block South on Manhattan to Driggs Avenue; turn right, and walk two blocks East on Driggs (through McCarren Park) to Union Avenue; turn left, and walk two blocks South on Union to Richardson Street; Royal Oak is on the corner.

A few photos from last time: